homeschooling & running a photography business

What does homeschooling look like when you’re running a business?

It looks like me writing this at 9:36pm after responding to inquiries, after reading books, after making dinner, cleaning up, and putting my 3.5 year old son Apollo to sleep for the second time,

It also looks like, me taking this opportunity of quiet and solitude to write out my thoughts - an opportunity much appreciated. When you homeschool and when you’re self employed, you have a million thoughts and a million worries. Everything feels equally important. You feel as if somehow, no matter how many things you cross off the to do list, the never ending list doesn’t ever really get close to being finished.

but.

the feeling that so many describe of not having enough time with their children, it probably won’t be one that I’ll experience.

I’m sure you’ve heard it before.

“enjoy it now, it goes by so fast”

I feel that.

I felt that as soon as my daughter was born.

I cried about it when she was a newborn, just a week old.

I knew that I’d miss whatever opportunity I didn’t take to spend with her because as much as I love creating, as much as I love this path that i’ve chosen for myself of making art and being part of everyone’s most intimate moments in life, my children are my passion and raising them is not only my calling but my soul’s purpose.

so yes I’m pretty tired.

yes, I often wish that I had a few more moments of quiet because i thrive off reflection.

and really what I struggle with most these days is feeling LIKe i’m not doing quite enough of everything. I’m not spending enough time taking care of myself and I’m not taking care of everyone else as much as I’d like to be.

I acknowledge these sentiments, these struggles, and also these blessings because at the end of the day I’m doing exactly what I want to be doing. I’m being an artist and I’m spending most of my days with the humans that are my magic.

homeschooling is a privilege but it’s also a big sacrifice.

We could have so much more time and I could take on jobs at a faster pace, but I sacrifice normalcy and my down time looks a little different.

With the very limited free time that i have, I learn, i read, i journal, i plan, i catch up with friends, i move my body, and i organize.

But you know what’s cool?

Luna and Apollo get to see first hand how hard their mom worked to first and foremost prioritize them and second build a whole business on her own, finally listening to the voice within her that called her to put out her own art.